You know the basics of how I feel when it comes to you, or at least hope you do. Specially by now. But honestly dude, I don't really know what it is about us now, but I won't ever let you go. You once meant to much. You have meant too much. And you probably always will. I do still mean that. You are my buddy. You'll always be my buddy. But nothing more. When I go down and finnally visit, we'll still all just have a good time. Me, Our best friend, and you. I wouldn't want it any other way. And who'd you think I'll be with while he's here? It'll be you & Shane. The movies, the stars, the laughs, and just everything we've ever wanted, just edited a bit. We won't be together, and I don't want to be. We're always gonna be those 2 who are better off as friends. And I say that because I can't fully believe the things you say. The stuff you do. And who you seem to be becoming. I love you for you, but I know you don't. You want change. Your even probably scared of where you're going, just don't know or even wanna stop. You think it helps, when it only hurts. You don't get the reactions or the feelings you long for, so you go deeper. And honestly babe, it won't work. It won't ever work unless you just learn to end this. There was a reason I met you Dustin. There were feelings. There are real feelings. Always will & always has been. I'm not gonna leave you like the rest, not like that. You will always have me to back you up, or at least try 'n help. I see a lot of potential. A lot of hope for a kid like you. You're becoming a young man. And I've meant when I've called you an amazing one. I get you're young, we all are. And your life is nothing that you would wish it were...and I'm sorry. I'm sorry for all those who have ever done you wrong. Ever hurt you. Ever screwed you up or over. I say this cause I care & I know some of them will never own up. But really dude, don't let that get to you so bad. Even subconciously. You don't truly think stuff out as much as you should. You know this. But honestly, you have me. You have Scruffy. You have your mom. You have amazing people in your life. Ones I know that count. And I'm hoping mean something big to you. You're an unbelievable young man. One I know could do whatever he really wished & wanted & tried for. One I will always be here for. You are a part of my life Dustin. Wrong choices or not. I might be wrong & stupid for this, but I can't let you go. Nor do I want to. You get me so mad, so hurt, so upset, worried, sad, annoyed....so many emotions happen with me. Sometimes cause of you. And regardless, I'm here. I'm here to stay dude...wheather you'd prefer me not to be or not. I'll always be here too. You really honestly do have a lot of greatness in you, you just gotta learn where to unlock it. Look towards the future, deal with the past & enjoy & learn from the present.
I love you for you Dustin.
You & Scruffy both. You two are amazing. I wouldn't replace you guys.
You both are just on different scales. And of course, Scruffy will always be my #1. So duh. He's my brother & bestestest friend.
But don't count yourself out. Just cause he's there, doesn't mean that I lie when I say you mean a lot too.
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