Ok. Confession time here.

Yes. I was hurt by Joanna. But no, I'm really not mad. I know life isn't perfect and that it's never going to be. But I had a right to do what I did, I just took advantage of it. Only just a bit, and it mixed with other shit going on. I'm more mad at myself and family issues. Not her.

But I am mad at him. I am hurt by him. Seriously I'm sick of these games. I'm sick of the lies, the shadows, the disrespect. I really.....really am. Like, he honestly seemed better. To both me & Joanna. Now I've lost even more respect for him, and gained back some for her.

It'll be awhile before things are perfect with me&her. But I'm not going back to him. Ever. Him&Joe can happily go fuck each other up their sorry asses. xD

After last nights convo with Kep, I'm honestly in a lot better mood. He taught me how to box everything up in my mind, calm me down and just be happy for once. Last night was the happiest I've been in a hell of a long time. I miss that Donna. I miss that side of me.

I'm no slut. Neither is Joanna. Neither are any of my close friends. But some people have lost that privilege. I'm there for any of my friends when they need me. I might be quick with anger when things happen...but I always come back around. Dustin, (for awhile) Joe, Niko....they're all good examples of that.

I'm sorry but to some, I'm just not the girl you remember. I'm not the same one I grew up as. I'm me now.

I don't know what else to do, but go with the flow. I'm calming down. I'm talking with Scruffy & Kep & J. And they're who I need to right now. Even Joanna to fully get things straightened out. Just...we all gotta relax. But Tom. You're gone.

You're not in my life.
You're not my friend.
You're not an aquatence.
You're nothing to me.

You screwed things over for yourself. Go ahead, fuck yourself and wallow in your self pity.

Have fun..